Thursday, March 12, 2020

How I Got Over Feeling Guilty About Quitting My Job

How I Got Over Feeling Guilty About Quitting My Job Its nice to be needed. Like a lot of people, I take great pride in knowing that Im an integral part of a team, and Ive worked hard to establish myself as a crucial asset to my employers past and present. I have a feeling a lot of you approach your careers this way, too.The only problem with this is, when it comes time to leave your job whetherbei its to pursue a new opportunity, to raise a family, or just to take a break you end up feeling incredibly guilty. What will your company do without you?I really loved my first full-time job. The work was interesting, I felt challenged, and my co-workers were great. I was a pretty strong performer, too. My sales numbers were good, I was (almost) always happy to work late, and I was even trusted to manage my bosss accounts during her maternity leave. That was a huge deal to my 22-year-old self. They needed meKnowing that I had become an essential member of the team felt great all my hard w ork had paid off. But, as time went on, I started thinking about my next move. Of course, guilt quickly crept in. Each step of my job search felt like I was secretly betraying my employer I felt awful. When I finally received an offer for a job I was really excited about, I found myself seriously debating whether or not I could actually accept. I genuinely believed things would completely fall apart if I left.I didnt know what to do. So, I turned to a trusted and seasoned source for advice my dad. With over thirty years of corporate experience under his belt, I knew he would understand my conundrum. But, when I shared the details of my situation with him, he just shrugged and said, You can leave. Theyll be fine without you.I think my jaw hit the floor.Then he shared this analogy with meImagine that your hand is in a bucket full of water. The water represents your company, and your hand represents you.Now pull your hand out.Thats how big the hole you leave behind will be.In other wo rds, my resignation would cause a temporary ripple (and maybe a few small waves) and then things would settle down and go back to normal. My boss, my co-workers, and my company would all be just fine without me.This is not to say that my contributions werent important, or that my co-workers wouldnt miss me. Of course they were and of course they would. But, they didnt absolutely need me to survive. Theyd figure it out.My dad went on to say that hed never seen an employer decide not to lay someone off because that person needed the job. And to this day, I havent either (and I work in HR). Businesses just dont really work that way so why should you?I ended up giving my two weeks notice the very next day and guess what? My boss was totally supportive. So was everyone on my team. Id spent hours on end stressing about giving notice for nothing. Aside from the minor (and probably necessary) blow to my ego, I was completely relieved.Since then, Ive quit my fair share of jobs and seen ton s of my friends and co-workers quit theirs, too. While some resignations go more smoothly than others, one thing remains the same the companies never fall apart.Im certainly not saying that the decision to leave a job is one that should be taken lightly quitting is a big deal. And yes, I realize that some departures create larger ripple effects than others. But ultimately, you need to make decisions based on your wants and needs first and foremost. In other words, put yourself first. That said, I always recommend doing your best to exit gracefully. Be aya to give plenty of notice and do what you can to make the transition as smooth as possible. Youll then be able to move on to whatever comes next feeling excited and guilt-free.It really does feel good to be needed but dont let that get in the way of puttingyourneeds first. The next time youre struggling with whether or not to pursue a new and exciting opportunity, think of that bucket full of water. Instead of worrying about the n egative (and temporary) effect your departure might have, focus on whats best for you.Oh, and in case you were wondering, my first employer - and every other employer Ive left since then - are all just fine without me.--Jaclyn Westlake is a career advice columnist, creator of the Job Hoppers Job Search Strategy Guide and founder of The Job Hop. With more than ten years of experience in the recruiting and human resources space, she is passionate about empowering job seekers to achieve their career goals. Shes also particularly fond of coffee, every dog in the world, and the city of San Francisco.Fairygodboss is committed to improving the workplace and lives of women.Join us by reviewing your employer

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